Another Squeaky Lane Script


Panel 1:

Dachsund: “You’re doing data entry now? The last I heard tell, you were pre-med, my friend!”

Octopus: “Yeah, no, I realized pretty quick it wasn’t for me.”

Panel 2:

Octopus narrates over image of himself twisting a balloon animal on an operating table: “The constant squeaking sound, twisting someone’s fricking LEG around their other leg to make it stay…”

Panel 3:

Octopus narrates over image of balloon animal popping on operating table. “I was good at it, but that’s no reason to do something you have no passion for, you know?”

Panel 4:

Octopus: Besides, this lets me do some writing on the side.
Dachsund: I understand. Some people just can’t stand the sight of blood. Not everyone can be a doctor, or, for that matter, a business owner like me. ‘From each according to his abilities.’

Panel 5:

Dachsund: Well now, it was swell catching up with you. Cheers.
Dachsund leaves, Octopus scowling at him.

Panel 6:

Poodle approaches Octopus.
Poodle: Who was that?
Octopus: Kevin Dachsund. That guy got even blowhardier, now that he owns a business.

Panel 7:

Poodle: Oh? What business?
Octopus: He inherited it from his dad. You know those ad-filled sites that pop up when you mis-type a web address?
Poodle: Pssh. He’s a link farmer? That shit’s nothing to be jealous of.

Panel 8:

Octopus kisses Poodle. Mwah.

Panel 9:

Octopus: Thanks for that. Honey, have I told you how glad I am to be dating someone who’s actually into ME and not just some weird tentacle rape fetish?

Poodle: Yeah, oh, umm… about that…

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One Response to “Another Squeaky Lane Script”

  1. Jackson Says:


    This is golden.

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