How I Became President


So here’s the story in brief:

I arrive at the second meeting of the Onondaga Community College Literary Society with hopes of finding more than the four other people who’d been at the first meeting.  (In fact, I brought along 20 copies of some of my favorite 55s.)  I do find one new person, but one of the kids from the first meeting is not there, so it’s still four.  What’s more, three of the four are club officers.

But that’s not entirely true, because Galen Valonis, the club president, has announced that he must step down from his esteemed post.  There’s some kind of new rule at OCC that you can’t be president of two clubs at once, and he’s already president of the drama club, so: time to elect someone new.  Since two of the four remaining people at the meeting are already officers (and happy in their position), that leaves two more: me (it’s my second meeting), and a new girl (it’s her first meeting).  So I think I became president of the club on the smallest amount of seniority you can possibly have.

(They tried to sell it as how they were very impressed with me the last meeting, and maybe they were, I am an old guy of 28 and they’re all like 19 and 20, and sometimes I sound quite smart when I’m not sounding like a complete goof, but still, let’s face it, they had no choice.)

So now I’m president.

I had fun tabling for the Literary Society today.  We put out lots of material, including short stories, 55s, and some hilarious fake advertisements from cartoonist Chris Ware (I’ll have to post them here at some point).  Unfortunately, we didn’t have any real banner telling people what our table was even for.  So whenever anyone slowed even slightly in front of our table, I went all President Outreach on their asses.  “Hey, Literary Society, come join!  We talk about books, but not in a lame way!  Do you read anything?  Cereal boxes, even?”  Stuff like that.

So far, as President, my main goal seems to be to get more than five other people in this club.  Hopefully when I graduate in a year or two I’ll leave enough people behind that they won’t have to elect a president whose experience with the club consists of one attended meeting.

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